BM Quarter Stat Day:

Blood Glucose:     Time:  2016     Reading:  184

Blood Pressure:     Not taken

    Breakfast: Normal.
    Lunch: None.
    Dinner: 16th of Colossal chicken pot pie with dollop of sour cream.
    Her Bowel Movement occurred about 1530: Very good volume; smeary consistency; very easy elimination; somewhat challenging clean-up.
    Today was another confession day, another low key day, courtesy of me. I have no idea if my mother would like to be more active but I seem to be having a problem working myself up to supervising activities for her, including practice walkering, I seem to need to focus on my "activities". She seems to be happy watching TV or DVDs (which I am not doing with her, which, I can tell, disturbs her a little). I am letting her sleep late. Today I think she arose at 1430. I can tell that this glut of sleep and lack of activity is cramping her style, a bit, but only slightly. If it gets too bad, if, for instance, it suddenly becomes impossible for her to raise herself out of her chair, I'll probably panic and completely divert my focus. I hate running our combined life like this but, sometimes, I need time for me so bad that I just take it. And Mom becomes a prisoner.
    Anyway, no nap today. I think it featured an 8 hour day. As I recall, she decided to bed down at around 2230, which means she walked into her bedroom at 2300 and her light went out around 2330. Oh. Then, that's a nine hour day. With no nap, that's doing pretty good.
    I can't remember why I suddenly decided to take that lone before-dinner BG, but I'm glad I did. She received two 10 mg glipizide, today, but only had two meals, as well. Even though she was up for what looks like about only nine hours, she had three lisinopril (10 mg) and three Niferex-150 of this or that type. I consider that she may have gone to bed low on liquids, but that remains to be seen. I wasn't paying very close attention.
    I remember what I did yesterday. I don't remember what she did. We were both in good moods, though. I, again, suggested that she might want to start one of the Paint-by-Numbers, but she just looked through the pyracantha curtain at the setting sun through our west window and said, "No, not right now."
    Her will and spirit remain strong. She's just not moving, much, and this contributes to lethargy, and neither she nor I have the extra energy to fight it.
    This is what I mean when I talk about dwindling resources and who pays the price...the unspoken values we hold regarding who is supported in fanning the flames of life and who is not. Clearly, not only my mother's resources are dwindling, so are mine, which enhances the dwindling of her resources...and, yet, we continue to live together in a perfectly amiable but not quite well enough supported life that contributes to her death. Not that this is a tragic circumstance. Society always participates, intimately, personally, the way God is said to participate, in the deaths of its citizens. It sets the odds. Some people defy the odds but, in defying them, set them.
    Nevertheless, I need to acknowledge when my resources are low and affecting my performance as my mother's life rallier. I need, as well, to acknowledge that I consider this a failure, am sure that a large part of that failure is personal, but I don't know, yet, how to handle these times.
    Whew. Well. I meant to write most of that, above, over at The Mom & Me Journals dot Net but it ended up over here. Hope it made sense.
    In that case, from here, later.